✎ news:off_the_record:5 [UMBA]

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====== Off The Record: Whitewashed Wool ======

//Ed; Er, don't we whitewash wool to make it white?//\\
//Ed2: no you idiot that's painting fences you dumbass//\\
//Ed; hey i din't know that ok//\\
//Ed2: SUUUUURE YOU DIDN't//\\
//Ed; u know im rel tired of ur shit//\\
//Ed3: Hey er, new naming scheme maybe?//\\
//Ed; shut ur face//\\
//Ed2: shut up ed3//\\
//Ed: HOW DO I EVEN WORK WITH YOU PEOPLE???  Next issue we start at A again.//
===== Item Eight =====
bloc**k**\\
that shady guy called clin**k**\\
those six headless corpses near clin**k**'s place and i know for a fact one of them was called headloc**k** because he put me in one when we were kids (because i wouldn't give him my gallant leap action figure) fuck off headlock look who's laughing now (it's me because you can't laugh once you've been decapitated)

watch your bac**k**

===== Item Eight =====

HEy, I hear Netpricesare going up for charges.  If anyone can do me 18R per charge that'd be great

===== Item Eight =====

we got hold of sentinels wealth report and published what they dont want u to no

least welthy

worst off

"""stakeholders"""

using the exchange rate we all know is real

and see how they'RE STILL ROllLIING IN IT

1 FAKE : 62,500 REAL

10: NETCAR - looks like all that shit about "helping people" is about helping herself to your CASH RIAEL - 3,125,000\\
9: ANGELER - oh no look at the poor gladiator oh wait no look at the fuckin reach gladiator - 3,0625,000\\
8: CYCLE-OPS - mustard sold the other eye for gOLD - 2,875,000\\
7: SOUTHPAW - imma let her slide because music is bangin and i bang to this music - 2,750,000\\
6: SPROCCOLI - network favourite Y SO POOr THEN? hmmmmm - 1,937,500\\
5: FOOTSIE - wait i thought this was A SQUISHINATOR ???? ?? - 1,875,000\\
4: BASTARD - ONE OF THEM ONE OF THEM - 1,562,500\\
3: VODKATRAP - maximus creeps me the fuck out - 1,500,000\\
2: OMESKIESSHESAMONSTERIMTELLINGYOU - 1,437,500\\
1: STRIKE - awoo? - 0\\


===== Item Eight ====

Can we please talk about Mesh?  I think it's really bleeding obvious, I don't know about you, but I don't know how anyone else can't see it?  I'm just saying what everyone's really thinking, what everyone knows deep down.  I'm just going to lay on the truth, none of this bullshit other people try to push in this rag.

Mesh.  Doesn't.  Own.  METROVORE.

===== Item Eight =====

a lot of monsters got killed this round

like

a lot

LOADS

loads of

inconvenient ones

uknowwhatimsaying

network

NETWORK

network is murdering your monsters

i'm calling it

hide your giant monstrosities

===== Item Eight =====

isitjustmeoristheborderalotstricterthanitusedtobe???

===== Item Eight =====

has anyone ever been to an ocean

===== Item Eight =====

I Have no time for ciphers, just... same place same time?  xxx i love you

===== Item Eight =====

**YOU THINK YOU HAVE DEFEATED ME?  I AM METROVORE AND I AM HERE TO DESTROY YOU UNLESS YOU FEED ME MORE FANFICTION.  DELICIOUS DELICIOUS FAN FICTION.   TELL ME MORE ABOUT HOW THE HOT CORPORATE EXECUTIVE HOLDS DOWN THE HOPEFUL TRUTH WRITERS.  I NEED THIS BROADCAST DURING YOUR NEXT ARENA FIGHT.  LOUDLY.**

===== Item Eight =====

No ifs!  No buts!  Don't serve us Monster Cuts!

===== Item Eight =====

I was there when Block died, and I'm telling you there was a bloody fight.  A really loud bloody fight and someone running away from the scene.  Block was murdered in cold blood, and someone's coming after the rest of the Champions.  Someone's ORGANISING this.  There's only 3 left: Cam, Nocturne, and Zephyr.  Everyone else is dead.  This isn't the Network, I'd know.

===== Item Eight =====

dIaMoNd KiLlEd MaStErS aNd FeD tHe EvIdEnCe To ThE cAt

gOoD jOb DiAmOnD

//er, what do you mean she's one of them//

aW sHiT
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