“FANS OF THE ARENA! YOU'VE SEEN THEM CLASH AS BITTER ENEMIES. YOU'RE ABOUT TO SEE THEM FIGHTING SIDE BY SIDE. ONCE ESTRANGED, NOW STRONGER THAN EVER - PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER FOR… TEAM SHAAAARDS FAAAALLING!”
The crowd roars its approval. Shards Falling have gained a higher profile since the earlier Arena match, and whilst Khaos still has his fair share of haters, most people seem to regard the ticklefight as a massive coup on Thistle's part.
“FACING THEM ARE THEIR REAL ARCHRIVALS! THE BIG-TIME MUSIC CELEBRITY NOW TURNED PRO WITH THE HAIR THAT EVERYONE LOVES TO DROOL OVER, AND HIS DOWN-TO-EARTH, BOY-NEXT-DOOR BEST FRIEND - GIVE IT UP FOR… TEAM HORIZOOOOON!”
Wild screams of “Go Crabgrass!” and “Marry me, Tornado!!!” abound. One Fan nearly falls over himself attempting to lean far enough over to catch a glimpse of Tornado's famous new fringe.
Crabgrass blows an ironic kiss at Thistle, who weathers this new indignity with steely pride. She does look a little green, however.
“ON THE ONE SIDE, WE HAVE KRYSTALKORPION - PURE CRYSTAL; PURE TERROR - AND THORN - THE LOVEABLE GIANT MASS OF SPINES! ON THE OTHER, TARAXACORE - THOSE OF YOU WITH ALLERGIES, BEWARE! - AND HURRICANE - MISTY, MALEVOLENT AND RARING TO GO!”
Khaos and Thistle eye their opponents. Taraxacore resembles a large, heavy-looking dinosaur with dandelion fluff in the place of a head. Meanwhile, Hurricane is an odd, amorphous blur of cloud. Crackles of lightning pulse deep within its core.
“WHO WILL EMERGE ON TOP IN THIS FINELY-BALANCED FEUD? LET'S FIND OUT! FIGHT COMMENCE!”
Krystalkorpion, true to form, hurtles towards Taraxacore, pincers clicking in anticipation. The two collide, heavily. Meanwhile, Thorn lashes out a couple of vines towards Hurricane, attempting to distract it. Thistle looks slightly ill, but determined, egging Thorn on as it lashes out at Tornado's Monster. The edge of the cloud disperses and reforms as it suffers lash after lash from the spiked limbs. Meanwhile, Krystalkorpion picks up a rock from the arena floor and hurls it towards Taraxacore, who stumbles, seemingly disorientated.
Several beams of forked lightning come hurling towards Krystalkorpion. It dodges, but its attention is diverted from Taraxacore.
“I feel that I just took you, like, way more seriously when you were doing music,” says Khaos from across the Arena, addressing Hurricane. “This whole Trainer experiment is basically kinda sad. KK - sick 'em!”
Krystalkorpion spins around, scuttles past Taraxacore, and goes tearing towards Hurricane, aiming for the centre of the cloud. The crowd lean forwards, eager to see how this pans out: is Hurricane even solid? Will Krystalkorpion just pass through?
Fortunately for Team Shards Falling, it does not. Rather, Krystalkorpion disappears into the cloud of mist surrounding Tornado's Monster. A split second later, it falls back - by all appearances having hit something solid. Hurricane recoils in a swirling gust, and with an unearthly shriek.
Another shaft of lightning comes shooting out of Hurricane - and this time, it hits. Krystalkorpion briefly disappears in a fragmented burst of light. Once the audience's eyes adjust, they can tell that it does not appear to have been taken out, but there is a black, burned-looking welt on the armour across its flank.
Not to be dissuaded, it throws itself at Hurricane with renewed vigour. If it can smash, it appears it will smash.
Meanwhile, Thistle looks Crabgrass in the eye. Crabgrass looks back.
“Pretender,” he scoffs.
“Sellout,” she hurls back.
“Mouldering weed!”
“Root vegetable!”
“Taraxacore - attack!”
“Thorn - DESTROY!”
Taraxacore, still reeling from Krystalkorpion's assault, goes pelting towards Thorn. A stray shaft of lightning goes soaring past its head, but it seems to hardly notice as it goes galumphing towards Taraxacore, limbs akimbo. As Thorn lashes out one tendril, low against the ground, the audience gasp: they know what's coming. Taraxacore's large foot catches against the limb, and it goes crashing to the floor. However, it kicks out at Thorn, sending its swirling limbs flying back, before it manages to right itself.
Taraxacore gives an ear-piercing squeak, and stamps on one of Thorn's limbs. Thorn, enraged, wraps another limb around its torso, squeezing hard. However, one of Taraxacore's clawed arms extends to scratch at the point where Thorn's limb meets its body. Thorn gives sudden, pained SCREEEEEEEE, as a claw scores across the delicate flesh below its spiked armour.
On the other side of the Arena, Krystalkorpion is keeping Hurricane at bay. It bears the brunt of the lightning attacks, dodging away from most, but suffering the heat of a few. Occasionally, it darts in and out of the mist: the crowd can hear the sickening snick of pincers, and howls of pain from Hurricane.
After a particularly heavy lash from Krystalkorpion's tail, Hurricane is sent flying across the Arena. The clouds around it briefly disperse: beneath it, a dark, two-legged figure is just discernible. It appears to be bleeding a dark, viscous substance from Krystalkorpion's attacks.
Hurricane - now almost fully visible as a shadowy, vaguely humanoid figure, goes sprinting away from Krystalkorpion. Krystalkorpion scuttles in pursuit, nipping at Hurricane's heels with its pincers. More thick, black blood spurts from the resultant wounds.
Hurricane suddenly rounds on Krystalkorpion. Limping towards it, it appears to summon up further reserves of strength. The clouds briefly reform around its shapeless body, and lightning begins to crackle at the centre.
Wasting no time, Krystalkorpion launches itself at Hurricane. Pincers clicking, tail lashing, it begins to hit and smash with all its might.
Hurrican teeters. Then, slowly, it topples. However, this is not before it sends out one last lightning shaft.
The lightning hits Krystalkorpion square in the face. With a pitiful screech, it falls to the floor.
Both Hurricane and Krystalkorpion appear to be out of the fight!
There is a short lull, as Taraxacore and Thorn are left facing one another. Then, all of a sudden, Taraxacore squeaks, as if stung. In a blind rage, it barrels towards Thorn, giant claws flashing in the Arena lights. Thorn, weakened from the blow before, does not lash out in time; instead, it catches the onslaught of claws and fury in full force. However, even whilst half-crushed, it manages to whack at Taraxacore with its vines, slicing against its flank.
The two Monsters hold one another in this lethal death grip for longer than anyone would think possible. Taraxacore claws at Thorn; Thorn hits at Taraxacore. Blood and sap splash across the Arena floor in great gouts.
Still, both appear to be flagging. Almost as if by mutual agreement, they relent. Thorn's grip slackens; Taraxacore's claws slow. Both go crashing to the floor, exhausted.
The Umpire stands, about to make his ruling, but then steps back with a resigned look, as Noggin darts up out of his seat.
“If I may,” he says.
“You may,” says the Umpire, heavily.
“The uninitiated observer,” says Noggin, “might suggest that this match was a draw. In reality, this could not be a clearer victory for Team Shards Falling.”
Appreciative laughter from the crowd. They're looking forward to seeing how he is going to spin this one.
Indeed, Noggin himself appears to be unsure as to how to continue.
“If you look very closely,” says Noggin, after only perhaps a second's hesitation, “you can just discern that Thorn… is still in motion!”
The audience and Umpire lean forwards, obligingly.
“Observe!” says Noggin. “Its spikes are currently moving!”
The audience and Umpire squint.
Some of Thorn's spikes do indeed appear to be very faintly wafting to and fro. It might be the wind. But then, it might not be.
The Umpire looks as though he might be about to argue - but he arrests himself. Perhaps this is due to the fact that he has no idea how to rule this one either, and is grateful for any kind of tie-breaker. Perhaps he fears the reaction of the crowd. Either way:
“Victory goes to Team Shards Falling!”